Healthy Ambition vs. Toxic Ambition

When do our dreams go from ambitious goals that are attainable and worth the reach, to delusional goals that keep us deluded, exhausted, and left without support? What is the difference between a dream and a pipe dream?

As a bipolar entrepreneur, our goals are often up for analysis and we are chastised for having delusions of grandeur. While many of my goals were and are attainable, I learned I was having delusions of grandeur based on the emotions I was feeling. Thankfully, my condition made it so that I relied on constantly monitoring and checking in with myself and my intentions. This did wonders in helping me develop a self-awareness that directs all of my behaviour while allowing me to accelerate my personal development and "inner work."

I learned that I was being delusional only when I had grandiose ideas that had no plan or validation from anything or anyone outside of myself.

This article goes through the steps and check ins that need to occur to protect yourself from entertaining and longing for dreams and goals that can break your spirit if/when they don't work out. Too many entrepreneurs get crushed when they place their whole lives on toxic goals and ambitions that deplete them vs. elevate them.

These are the signs that your dream is an audacious goal rooted in toxic ambition.

Sign #1: This is a Why You Developed on a Whim

One of the best telltale signs that you're spinning your wheels with a goal that you are putting too much of your energy and time away from your family and friends and that is/will not serve you in the long term.

This is when you have an experience, positive or negative, and you declare a goal while acting out of an emotionally reactive place. Look back on the goals you have now and ask yourself: was this a goal I developed gradually through time and is it rooted in my values? Or did I drum it up out an emotional impulse or by other reactive means.

Example: It's like a getting a tattoo on a whim. It may sound great in the moment but this is a long term decision made in a short time = impulsive/reactive behaviour = catastrophic consequences.

Sign #2: You're More Excited Than You are Dedicated

When you make a decision to open a new business, venture, relationship or take up a new hobby or maybe a side hustle, and it is done with sheer emotion without any logical or mediated analysis, it's likely that you are experiencing the side effects of "shiny object syndrome." Having sheer excitement over an idea without a plan or consumer buy-in, is equivalent to wanting to be a rockstar without having any desire to take guitar lessons.

Note: If the process to achieve the goal is not nearly as exciting as the result, it shows you are not dedicated to its actualization, making it remain a pipe dream.

Sign #3: The Idea is Created and Maintained in Isolation

One of the major ideas behind our work at Bitton Brand (BB) Consulting, is that we teach our clients that an idea can never be considered good or marketable if it is conceived, developed, and maintained in a vacuum. The most successful business owners and entrepreneur understand the immense and critical value of workshopping their ideas with the ideal clients and end users of their product or services. If you work on an invention for 10 years in your basement, no one is going to be able to incorporate their input which means all your time was spent making and developing an isolated idea that could be irrelevant or obsolete by the time the idea sprouts from under the rock it lives under.

Sign #4: Your Family and Friends Begin to Worry about You

Most of us entrepreneurs have experienced that often times our family and friends are aren't on the same page about our pursuits, especially if they don't value our way of life which is about taking risks, holding ourselves accountable, and blazing our own trails. But there is a difference between them not understanding why you're doing something and them not understanding why the idea is needed, wanted, or valued in the world.

Note: Use the mom rule: If you cannot share your business idea in a way that is simple, concise and captivating, enough to make your mom understand and interested, then you may have an idea that is too complex, convoluted, or isolated from the world.

Sign #5: You've invested all your solo and family time, money, and energy

Our creative ideas are not there to drain us. We often take on tasks and missions that consume us thinking that if we put our all into something, we're going to get our all back. But it can be dangerous to work at something that only you can appreciate and embrace. The more you invest your time and energy, the higher the stakes for disappointment, disheartenment, and destruction. Entrepreneurs should never strip themselves naked for any singular idea especially if it hasn't been tested, presented and pitched to its end user or potential investors and stakeholders.

The right goals that come from your core values, are often well-received, nicely resourced, and are much more likely to energize us rather than deplete us. Blowing our own steam causes us to dissipate mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. We may be self-employed but that doesn't mean we need to create in a vacuum or isolate our ideas and work.

If you've got a great idea, share it and make a plan for it. Visualize it and put your theories, ideas, and observations to the test by consulting your coaches and prospects who can give you the objectivity you need to turn a dream from a pipe dream to your mission and life's purpose.